As I can't think of anything to write about today, I will instead complete the following quiz, as found on Or so I thought whilst blindly stumbling around the worldwide interweb last night (or early this morning).
1)You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? I'd wait until the next Blair-Bush meeting, take out Bush and hope that Blair exploded through standing too close (like up Bush's ass).
2) You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be? Tempted though I am to say The Strokes, I should really strike a blow for everyone by deleting Gareth Gates. He can't sing, he can't speak, he looks ridiculous - no great loss to the world's airwaves.
3) Who would you really like to just punch in the face? I'm a lover, not a fighter, but for the purposes of the poll, let's say Tony Blair (provided he hasn't already been blown up after question one). It's his government's fault that I owe the student loans company almost a year's salary.
4) What is your favorite cheese? Scottish cheddar
5) You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make? Chicken and sweetcorn on a freshly-baked white Scottish roll.
6) You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice? That's a toughy, but after careful consideration, I'll have to go with Jennifer Aniston.
7) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick? No contest. Jessica Simpson.
8) Now that you've slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it? That's not a lot of money, but I'd probably blow the lot on CDs and DVDs
9) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Tokyo - one of the places in the world I've always wanted to visit but haven't reached yet.
10) Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do? Spend it on a fancy electronic item of some description which would inevitably make my life seem more fulfilling.
11) An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is...? Cointreau. I love it, but it is pretty pricy.
12) Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there? To London or San Francisco during flower power to hang out with all the beautiful people.
13) You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? I am always right. Even when I am wrong.
14) You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what's the premise? I'd be quite happy to host my own music chat show like Jools Holland or that crap one that Jo Wiley did in the late 1990s. I'd have to think of a snappy title - how about Jukebox Jock - no, that sucks.
15) What is your favorite curse word? No other word in the English language has the versatility of the F-word. Whether as a verb, adjective or noun, it is perfect for any occasion.
16) You awaken and find your bed surrounded by Mummies. They don't do anything, but just stand there. How do you react to their presence? I should imagine I would freak out at being surrounded by Egyptians who have been dead for thousands of years. How did they get into my house?
17) Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don't worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what's the item? Being practical, it would have to be my wallet. Being impractical, my MP3 player, as there are loads of rare tracks on it I probably wouldn't be able to find again.
18) The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour? I'd spend the time with Mrs Wife, making Buckasaurus (the mythical beast with two backs).
19) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be? It would have to be invisibility. If you're invisible, you can do ANYTHING. Steal with impunity, find out what people are doing and what they're saying about you and just generally have a swell time.
20) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? The last half hour of my wedding dance, when everyone was drunk, hyperactive and dancing, and the night concluded with the piper playing a never-ending reel.
21) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? (the answer "nothing" doesn't count) The death of my grandfather.
22) You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit... you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin'! What country are you going to live in now? Probably back to Australia, as I enjoyed living there despite being penniless. It'd be even better as a rich, invisible time traveller
23) This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be? The Elephant and Wheelbarrow in Northbridge, Perth, Western Australia.
24) Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question.... If you did, then we'll just expand on that. Check it out... Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like "Dude, check it out... I can FLOAT!"? My former flatmate John McInally - he'd be very impressed and very jealous.
25) The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life? I would say John Lennon, but he was getting kinda dull towards the end of his life. Let's go with Jimi Hendrix, I'm sure he had plenty lost worlds still to explore when he died.
26) The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn't think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? Both of my grandfathers.
27) What's your theme song? I don't know if I have one. My favourite song is Strawberry Fields Forever, but T Rex's 20th Century Boy seems more apt.
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