Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Lawnmower Man

Jim, the all-seeing individual in charge of the universe, is smiling on me this week.

Mrs Wife and I have been on holiday since Good Friday, and the sun has been beating down ever since.

Ideally, this would mean spending a whole week relaxing in my new hammock in my new garden, but things don't always work out in an ideal fashion.

Firstly, I HAVE a garden, which has vast lawns at front and rear. And this means that I have an atomic shedload of grass to cut.

So, at the helm of a bright orange device that looks more like a floor buffer than a blade-spinning destroyer of weeds and Mrs Wife's flowers, I began battle with the grounds of Dungroanin' first thing this morning.

And it's pretty hard going. But although I expected to resent the activity and the drain on my precious holiday hours, it was actually almost enjoyable. There's something almost therapeutic about going head-to-head with nature in the glorious spring sunshine.

Of course, I looked cool whilst engaged in this tidying up of the ranch - the Magic Tune Box pumped the sexy soul of Amy Winehouse into my lugs as I worked, and my new wraparound shades protected my peepers from the sunshine and the flying dandelion heads.

And now Dungroanin' is ready for a visit from the Inlaws. Luckily, Mrs Wife's parents will get their first look at Chateau Jock in glorious sunshine and with the garden looking as good as is ever likely.

But, if future battles of the lawn are to be tackled in the appropriate fashion, I'm going to need to invest in some serious military hardware. So I think I'll take some advice from Eric.


Anonymous said...

... rock on, big man.... you should see the size of my lawn..... good lord....


Mirk said...

Remember... to keep your grass looking good only cut a third of it's length off at a time no more.

To early yet but whack some 8.0.0 on it and you will have a bowling green in no time.

When it's in tip top condition post a pic to prove you are now a master gardener... or just lounge in the hammock far better :0)

Groanin' Jock said...

Sounds like you're an expert Mirk - don't suppose you fancy coming east to demonstrate your skills do you?

And Eric, next time you're over visiting in Angus, you can bring the armoured tank you call a lawnmower - reckon it would make short work of the grass at Dungroanin'.