These are a few of my favourite things:
Walking around barefoot both indoors and outdoors.
Wearing a new pair of jeans for the first time.
Listening to someone who can really play a harmonica.
The smell of freshly tumble dried clothes.
Waking up on a sunny Saturday morning when I have no plans.
Ginger Baker's drum fills on "The White Room".
Family movies from the 1980s.
The fizz of excitement when the house lights are turned off just before a gig starts.
Scotland scoring a goal in a competitive international football match.
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Monday, December 28, 2009
The 2009 Jock Awards
I'm sprawled on the couch at Dungroanin', enjoying the post-festive lull, so it seems the ideal time to host the awards ceremony no-one is waiting for, the 2009 Jock Awards.
The Stone Roses award for Album of The Year: (Nominees: The Decemberists - The Hazards of Love; Manic Street Preachers - Journal For Plague Lovers, Doves - Kingdom of Rust; The Prodigy - Invaders Must Die; Kasabian - West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum)
A few weeks back, I was discussing the year's best albums with a couple of friends. At that time, I was fairly certain it had been a pretty poor year for records. But looking back through the Magic Tune Box, it seems I'd simply forgotten that a number of pretty darn good albums were released this year. Of the five best, I'm torn between The Decemberists' folk concept album, Doves' grandiose indie guitar and The Prodigy's startling return to form. Pushed for a decision, I'd have to go with The Decemberists and their woodlands-based tale of a lady called Margaret.
The Strawberry Fields Forever award for Single of The Year: (Nominees: The Prodigy - Warrior's Dance; Kasabian - Underdog; Gossip - Heavy Cross; Lily Allen - The Fear; Florence and The Machine - You've Got The Love)
Just as The Verve's Love Is Noise soundtracked my summer in 2008, Kasabian's Underdog was my tune of choice for most of this year. Chiming guitars, heavy beats and a sound taking the Madchester sound forward again, no other track inspired me the way that the first glimpse of Kasabian's latest lunacy did.
The Rolling Stones award for Live Act of The Year: (Nominees: Take That, Neil Young, AC/DC, Them Crooked Vultures, Jane's Addiction)
If this was a bumper year for albums, it was a phenomenal year for live music. This was the year I saw Neil Young and AC/DC for the first time, as well as the disappointment of Dylan. Take That's show was head and shoulders the most complex I've ever seen, eclipsing even The Rolling Stones and U2, while AC/DC pulled off stadium rock with the ease of grizzled veterans. But the single greatest performance was Neil Young's at the Aberdeen Exhibition and Conference Centre. A "best of" set that found Mr Young in sparkling form, he was phenomenal from start to finish, climaxing with a howling take on The Beatles' A Day In The Life.
The Goodfellas Award for Movie of the Year: (Nominees: Paranormal Activity; Watchmen; Star Trek; The Boat That Rocked)
Mrs Wife and I haven't been to the cinema as often as normal this year, and we wasted two cinema trips on the disappointing Transformers 2 and Terminator: Salvation. And we still haven't seen Avatar or Sherlock Holmes. My choice for movie of the year would be Paranormal Activity, proving that you don't need a multi-million dollar budget to keep your audience on the edge of their seats.
The Knight Rider award for TV Programme of The Year: (Nominees: Fringe; True Blood; Spooks; Generation Kill; FlashForward)
Another good year for television and justification for owning a Sky+ box. Most of the really good stuff continues to come from across the Atlantic, and it was True Blood, the televised adaptation of the Sookie Stackhouse novels, that led the way. I've always been a sucker for a vampire story set in the modern age, from The Littlest Vampire through The Lost Boys and onwards. True Blood just continued the trend.
The Marilyn Monroe award for Babe of The Year: (Nominees: Salma Hayek; Nadine Coyle; Cheryle Cole; Beyonce Knowles; Michelle Keegan)
Assuming, as always, that Mrs Wife is the genuine winner of this category from now until the end of the Blogosphere, I'd happily take any of the above nominees as runner-up (or all five together with whipped cream and chocolate sauce). But for the sake of handing out the gong, it's Salma Hayek who walks away as the "winner".
The Jet Set Willy Award for Computer Game of The Year: (Nominees: Football Manager 2010; Rock Band)
The only guaranteed shoo-in of all the awards, Football Manager continues to go from strength to strength, this year with an overhaul of its match engine and the ability to create competitions - the Scottish League pyramid system created by one gifted fan is simply amazing.
The Godfather III award for Biggest Disappointment of The Year: (Nominees: The death of Michael Jackson; Bob Dylan live; Transformers 2; Arctic Monkeys' third album)
Bob Dylan was horrendous live. Of all the concerts I saw this year, that was by far the worst. But the biggest disappointment of the year was undoubtedly the passing of the King of Pop, barely weeks before Mrs Wife and I were due to see him perform in London. We still had a great holiday in the Big Smoke, but his demise left a huge gap in our year and in the music world.
The Screamadelica award for Scottish Album of The Year: (Nominee: Miyagi - Scalextro South Americana)
I'm struggling to think of any notable contributions from north of the border, so this year's award goes to Miyagi, even if a four-track EP scarcely counts as an album. An odd mix of instruments harnessed together for a fantastic ensemble sound.
The Stone Roses award for Album of The Year: (Nominees: The Decemberists - The Hazards of Love; Manic Street Preachers - Journal For Plague Lovers, Doves - Kingdom of Rust; The Prodigy - Invaders Must Die; Kasabian - West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum)
A few weeks back, I was discussing the year's best albums with a couple of friends. At that time, I was fairly certain it had been a pretty poor year for records. But looking back through the Magic Tune Box, it seems I'd simply forgotten that a number of pretty darn good albums were released this year. Of the five best, I'm torn between The Decemberists' folk concept album, Doves' grandiose indie guitar and The Prodigy's startling return to form. Pushed for a decision, I'd have to go with The Decemberists and their woodlands-based tale of a lady called Margaret.
The Strawberry Fields Forever award for Single of The Year: (Nominees: The Prodigy - Warrior's Dance; Kasabian - Underdog; Gossip - Heavy Cross; Lily Allen - The Fear; Florence and The Machine - You've Got The Love)
Just as The Verve's Love Is Noise soundtracked my summer in 2008, Kasabian's Underdog was my tune of choice for most of this year. Chiming guitars, heavy beats and a sound taking the Madchester sound forward again, no other track inspired me the way that the first glimpse of Kasabian's latest lunacy did.
The Rolling Stones award for Live Act of The Year: (Nominees: Take That, Neil Young, AC/DC, Them Crooked Vultures, Jane's Addiction)
If this was a bumper year for albums, it was a phenomenal year for live music. This was the year I saw Neil Young and AC/DC for the first time, as well as the disappointment of Dylan. Take That's show was head and shoulders the most complex I've ever seen, eclipsing even The Rolling Stones and U2, while AC/DC pulled off stadium rock with the ease of grizzled veterans. But the single greatest performance was Neil Young's at the Aberdeen Exhibition and Conference Centre. A "best of" set that found Mr Young in sparkling form, he was phenomenal from start to finish, climaxing with a howling take on The Beatles' A Day In The Life.
The Goodfellas Award for Movie of the Year: (Nominees: Paranormal Activity; Watchmen; Star Trek; The Boat That Rocked)
Mrs Wife and I haven't been to the cinema as often as normal this year, and we wasted two cinema trips on the disappointing Transformers 2 and Terminator: Salvation. And we still haven't seen Avatar or Sherlock Holmes. My choice for movie of the year would be Paranormal Activity, proving that you don't need a multi-million dollar budget to keep your audience on the edge of their seats.
The Knight Rider award for TV Programme of The Year: (Nominees: Fringe; True Blood; Spooks; Generation Kill; FlashForward)
Another good year for television and justification for owning a Sky+ box. Most of the really good stuff continues to come from across the Atlantic, and it was True Blood, the televised adaptation of the Sookie Stackhouse novels, that led the way. I've always been a sucker for a vampire story set in the modern age, from The Littlest Vampire through The Lost Boys and onwards. True Blood just continued the trend.
The Marilyn Monroe award for Babe of The Year: (Nominees: Salma Hayek; Nadine Coyle; Cheryle Cole; Beyonce Knowles; Michelle Keegan)
Assuming, as always, that Mrs Wife is the genuine winner of this category from now until the end of the Blogosphere, I'd happily take any of the above nominees as runner-up (or all five together with whipped cream and chocolate sauce). But for the sake of handing out the gong, it's Salma Hayek who walks away as the "winner".
The Jet Set Willy Award for Computer Game of The Year: (Nominees: Football Manager 2010; Rock Band)
The only guaranteed shoo-in of all the awards, Football Manager continues to go from strength to strength, this year with an overhaul of its match engine and the ability to create competitions - the Scottish League pyramid system created by one gifted fan is simply amazing.
The Godfather III award for Biggest Disappointment of The Year: (Nominees: The death of Michael Jackson; Bob Dylan live; Transformers 2; Arctic Monkeys' third album)
Bob Dylan was horrendous live. Of all the concerts I saw this year, that was by far the worst. But the biggest disappointment of the year was undoubtedly the passing of the King of Pop, barely weeks before Mrs Wife and I were due to see him perform in London. We still had a great holiday in the Big Smoke, but his demise left a huge gap in our year and in the music world.
The Screamadelica award for Scottish Album of The Year: (Nominee: Miyagi - Scalextro South Americana)
I'm struggling to think of any notable contributions from north of the border, so this year's award goes to Miyagi, even if a four-track EP scarcely counts as an album. An odd mix of instruments harnessed together for a fantastic ensemble sound.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Sunday Soul: Bobby Womack and Peace - Across 110th Street
Taken from the opening credits of Quentin Tarantino's Jackie Brown.
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
Walt Disney Marvel At That
Disney's acquisition of Marvel Comics yesterday for USD 4 billion has, unsurprisingly, seen a lot of people get their Spiderman pants in a twist at the prospect of the world's most sugary sweet company taking control of some of the biggest superhero names.
But that's the wrong viewpoint to take. Few companies on Earth have the global marketing reach that Disney does. Fewer still are so well represented across so many media - cartoons, live action shows, movies, comics, toys, computer games, theme parks and every form of merchandising tie-in under the sun.
Marvel can only benefit from having that kind of financial and marketing muscle behind it.
But almost immediately, some sections of the interweb went into overdrive at the prospect of Mickey Mouse joining the X-Men, Spider-Man joining forces with Donald Duck and Goofy facing Hulk.
However, Disney has a history not just with its own core characters, but in branches of popular culture one wouldn't normally associate with Uncle Walt's empire.
Quite aside from Disney's own Pirates of the Carribbean franchise, what a lot of the denizens of the blogosphere appear to have overlooked is that Disney also owns Mirmax Films. A quick scan of the list of films released by Miramax throws up:
Reservoir Dogs (Extended scenes of torture and graphic violence)
Pulp Fiction (Homosexual rape, gimps, violence, drug overdoses and so on)
Trainspotting (Heroin abuse, violence, sex)
Dogma (Alanis Morrissette as God)
The Talented Mr Ripley (Homosexuality, murder)
Bridget Jones's Diary (Sex, and one woman's obsessions with it. Oblique references to anal sex.)
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (Non-PC humour of almost every kind)
Gangs of New York (Violence)
Kill Bill (Yet more violence)
Clerks 2 (Bestiality amongst other attractions)
No Country For Old Men (Crazy serial killer cutting a swathe across America)
There Will Be Blood (Probably nothing too objectional, but hardly standard "Disney" fare)
and so on.
Disney hasn't bought Marvel because it wants to publish comics. And it hasn't bought Marvel so it can mess about with comics. If anything, the additional cash behind Marvel may enable it to publish more comics.
Sure, we might see a Pirates of the Caribbean series appear on Marvel in the future. But a Fantastic Four/Minnie Mouse crossover isn't going to be on the cards.
What the deal will enable Marvel to do is keep on doing what it does - publishing the best comics starring the best characters. Batman and The Joker aside, all of the best characters from the two main comic publishing houses are owned by Marvel. And now they have the financial backing to grow further.
But if Disney hasn't bought Marvel for its comics, why do the deal in the first place?
Because it now has access to 70 years of history - from Stan Lee's original Spider-Man and Fantastic Four comics onwards. The movie versions of Spider-Man and X-Men were huge box office smashes, while Fantastic Four and the Hulk have also performed fairly well.
Disney can add its considerable financial and movie muscle to this vast history (once current movie deals for Spider-Man, Iron Man, Hulk and Fantastic Four expire).
All in all, it seems to be a good deal for both parties.
And if Wolverine does get to make Bambi into venison with those claws?I'd watch that...
But that's the wrong viewpoint to take. Few companies on Earth have the global marketing reach that Disney does. Fewer still are so well represented across so many media - cartoons, live action shows, movies, comics, toys, computer games, theme parks and every form of merchandising tie-in under the sun.
Marvel can only benefit from having that kind of financial and marketing muscle behind it.
But almost immediately, some sections of the interweb went into overdrive at the prospect of Mickey Mouse joining the X-Men, Spider-Man joining forces with Donald Duck and Goofy facing Hulk.
However, Disney has a history not just with its own core characters, but in branches of popular culture one wouldn't normally associate with Uncle Walt's empire.
Quite aside from Disney's own Pirates of the Carribbean franchise, what a lot of the denizens of the blogosphere appear to have overlooked is that Disney also owns Mirmax Films. A quick scan of the list of films released by Miramax throws up:
Reservoir Dogs (Extended scenes of torture and graphic violence)
Pulp Fiction (Homosexual rape, gimps, violence, drug overdoses and so on)
Trainspotting (Heroin abuse, violence, sex)
Dogma (Alanis Morrissette as God)
The Talented Mr Ripley (Homosexuality, murder)
Bridget Jones's Diary (Sex, and one woman's obsessions with it. Oblique references to anal sex.)
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (Non-PC humour of almost every kind)
Gangs of New York (Violence)
Kill Bill (Yet more violence)
Clerks 2 (Bestiality amongst other attractions)
No Country For Old Men (Crazy serial killer cutting a swathe across America)
There Will Be Blood (Probably nothing too objectional, but hardly standard "Disney" fare)
and so on.
Disney hasn't bought Marvel because it wants to publish comics. And it hasn't bought Marvel so it can mess about with comics. If anything, the additional cash behind Marvel may enable it to publish more comics.
Sure, we might see a Pirates of the Caribbean series appear on Marvel in the future. But a Fantastic Four/Minnie Mouse crossover isn't going to be on the cards.
What the deal will enable Marvel to do is keep on doing what it does - publishing the best comics starring the best characters. Batman and The Joker aside, all of the best characters from the two main comic publishing houses are owned by Marvel. And now they have the financial backing to grow further.
But if Disney hasn't bought Marvel for its comics, why do the deal in the first place?
Because it now has access to 70 years of history - from Stan Lee's original Spider-Man and Fantastic Four comics onwards. The movie versions of Spider-Man and X-Men were huge box office smashes, while Fantastic Four and the Hulk have also performed fairly well.
Disney can add its considerable financial and movie muscle to this vast history (once current movie deals for Spider-Man, Iron Man, Hulk and Fantastic Four expire).
All in all, it seems to be a good deal for both parties.
And if Wolverine does get to make Bambi into venison with those claws?I'd watch that...
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Home, Home On The Range
Mrs Wife and I have just returned from a hectic few days in London. We had originally booked the trip to see Michael Jackson at the O2, which had been scheduled for Wednesday, but as we'd bought and paid for flights and hotel, we decided to have the holiday anyway.
And, in the space of five days in the capital, we:
And, in the space of five days in the capital, we:
- Went to the Comedy Store's improv night, where we were entertained by the hilarious talents of Josie Lawrence, Andy Smart, Lee Simpson, Suki Webster, Richard Vranch and Stephen Frost.
- Dined at the Hard Rock Cafe with Baby Brother and his girlfriend (who had been due to see Jacko's concert with us).
- Visited the Tower of London, Tower Bridge, the London Tombs, St Paul's Cathedral, Covent Garden and Camden Market.
- Took a cruise along the Thames from Westminster to Greenwich.
- Saw Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart (or Gandalf and Jean Luc Picard or Magneto and Professor Xavier depending on your own personal geek persuasion) in Waiting For Godot at the Theatre Royal.
- Attended, at Mrs Wife's request, We Will Rock You, which wasn't as bad as I had thought it might be.
- Avoided a Biblical downpour by spending £27(!) on cinema tickets for Transformers 2. Which seemed almost identical to the first one, but with more gratuitous shots of Megan Fox's cleavage - ie it was pretty darn good.
- Met up with Mrs Wife's cousin and a friend of mine from my university days that I haven't seen in more than seven years for a boozy afternoon in Theatreland.
All in all, a pretty productive, if tiring, five days.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Terminated
I'm no businessman - I like the security of a full-time job and a guaranteed pay cheque at the end of each month.
But I think I'm savvy enough to know that, when naming a company, it's probably best not to name your business after the fictional company from one of the largest film franchises in movie history.
A quick search for the Cyberdyne - the company from the Terminator films that is ultimately responsible for creating Skynet, which builds the titular robots - reveals that several firms around the world share their name with the fictional entity.
There's Cyberdyne Gauges, based in New Eagle, PA. (The ONE by which ALL of the others WILL BE GAUGED!)
Then there's Cyberdyne Systems, a software consultancy firm based in England.
Then, finally, there's the Japanese Cyberdyne, which, worryingly is building robotic suits....
Friday, April 10, 2009
Rocking
Mrs Wife and I have just returned from Skegness' Tower Cinema, where we spent the evening watching The Boat That Rocked.
I think it's the first time I've been to the cinema and had the film interrupted by an intermission midway through.
That slight annoyance aside, the movie was very funny and highly entertaining from start to finish.
But even more enjoyable was the soundtrack, a rollicking ride through the best the 1960s had to offer. In fact, it was so good I got goosebumps three times simply because of the music - twice because of music by The Rolling Stones.
Not a bad way to spend the evening, all in all.
I think it's the first time I've been to the cinema and had the film interrupted by an intermission midway through.
That slight annoyance aside, the movie was very funny and highly entertaining from start to finish.
But even more enjoyable was the soundtrack, a rollicking ride through the best the 1960s had to offer. In fact, it was so good I got goosebumps three times simply because of the music - twice because of music by The Rolling Stones.
Not a bad way to spend the evening, all in all.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Random Mutterings
Note to McDonald's - I don't know what an M Burger is, but the stupid advert you're showing roughly seventeen times a second is enough to put me off buying one.
I'm pretty sure my right leg is going to fall off before I hit 30. A baldy-headed twat knackered it two minutes into a "friendly" football match last week, and it hasn't been the same since. There may be trouble ahead.
The first five tracks of the new Oasis album are pretty good, but there's a dramatic tail-off until Liam's final track, Soldier On. Better than Heathen Chemistry and Standing On The Shoulder Of Giants, but not up there with their greatest work, not by a long chalk.
Driving to work sucks ass. I've been forced to this week because of the strikes affecting Scotland's railways. I miss reading my book and relaxing on the train to work, especially as the book I'm reading, The Sum of All Fears, is getting REALLY interesting.
How To Lose Friends and Alienate People isn't a great movie. Not horrific, but by no means great. It has its occasional funny moments, but they're few and far between. But any movie that boasts Megan Fox in her underwear can't be all bad.
Think that pretty much sums up the contents of my head at the moment. Roll on Scotland v Norway tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure my right leg is going to fall off before I hit 30. A baldy-headed twat knackered it two minutes into a "friendly" football match last week, and it hasn't been the same since. There may be trouble ahead.
The first five tracks of the new Oasis album are pretty good, but there's a dramatic tail-off until Liam's final track, Soldier On. Better than Heathen Chemistry and Standing On The Shoulder Of Giants, but not up there with their greatest work, not by a long chalk.
Driving to work sucks ass. I've been forced to this week because of the strikes affecting Scotland's railways. I miss reading my book and relaxing on the train to work, especially as the book I'm reading, The Sum of All Fears, is getting REALLY interesting.
How To Lose Friends and Alienate People isn't a great movie. Not horrific, but by no means great. It has its occasional funny moments, but they're few and far between. But any movie that boasts Megan Fox in her underwear can't be all bad.
Think that pretty much sums up the contents of my head at the moment. Roll on Scotland v Norway tomorrow.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Monday, August 04, 2008
Universal
Mrs Wife and I watched the movie Cocoon last night.
It's the first time I'd seen the movie in what must be at least 10 years, but is probably considerably more.
There's something about family-friendly American movies from the 1980s that I just can't get enough of, and I've never quite been able to place my finger on it.
Maybe its the cheesy 80s pop that blares from every car stereo - a curious blend of pop hooks, synths and watered-down faux hip-hop beats.
Perhaps its the fashions that taste forgot, brought back into our sitting rooms as though from another world.
But most of all, I think it's the simplicity of the sets and the action. No CGI-assisted action; no computer animation; just wholesome family fun in a world before Pixar.
The list of those films is, I think, nearly inexhaustible. In addition to Cocoon, the films I'm thinking of are Batteries Not Included, Jaws, TeenWolf, Ferris Bueller's Day Off (perhaps not quite so family friendly), Home Alone, The Goonies, Weird Science, The Karate Kid and Back To TheFuture.
I was born in 1980 and therefore didn't hit my teenage years until the mid-1990s. So I grew up with those family films. And they showed a different world, which although broadly similar to mid-1980s Scotland, still looked alien to me eyes. America was a land where it never seemed to rain, where the toys and sweeties were different from those available on this side of the Atlantic and where aliens could feasibly be found living in your garage.
I doubt we'll ever see their simple likes again.
It's the first time I'd seen the movie in what must be at least 10 years, but is probably considerably more.
There's something about family-friendly American movies from the 1980s that I just can't get enough of, and I've never quite been able to place my finger on it.
Maybe its the cheesy 80s pop that blares from every car stereo - a curious blend of pop hooks, synths and watered-down faux hip-hop beats.
Perhaps its the fashions that taste forgot, brought back into our sitting rooms as though from another world.
But most of all, I think it's the simplicity of the sets and the action. No CGI-assisted action; no computer animation; just wholesome family fun in a world before Pixar.
The list of those films is, I think, nearly inexhaustible. In addition to Cocoon, the films I'm thinking of are Batteries Not Included, Jaws, TeenWolf, Ferris Bueller's Day Off (perhaps not quite so family friendly), Home Alone, The Goonies, Weird Science, The Karate Kid and Back To TheFuture.
I was born in 1980 and therefore didn't hit my teenage years until the mid-1990s. So I grew up with those family films. And they showed a different world, which although broadly similar to mid-1980s Scotland, still looked alien to me eyes. America was a land where it never seemed to rain, where the toys and sweeties were different from those available on this side of the Atlantic and where aliens could feasibly be found living in your garage.
I doubt we'll ever see their simple likes again.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
My Life In Movies
As seen over at Inchy's site - the My Life In Movies meme.
The premise is simple - pick your favourite movie from every year since you were born.
My list is below - feel free to offer your thoughts. As for tagging further players, everyone can play along if they want to.
1980 - The Empire Strikes Back
1981 - Raiders of the Lost Ark
1982 - ET
1983 - Scarface/Return of the Jedi (Tie)
1984 - The Terminator
1985 - Back To The Future
1986 - Aliens
1987 - Full Metal Jacket
1988 - A Fish Called Wanda
1989 - Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade
1990 - Goodfellas
1991 - Terminator 2
1992 - Reservoir Dogs
1993 - Groundhog Day
1994 - Forrest Gump/Pulp Fiction (Tie)
1995 - The Usual Suspects (Also nominated - Se7en, Casino)
1996 - Trainspotting
1997 - LA Confidential
1998 - The Big Lebowski
1999 - Fight Club
2000 - Memento
2001 - Donnie Darko
2002 - The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers
2003 - Kill Bill: Volume 1
2004 - Kill Bill: Volume 2
2005 - The Revenge of The Sith
2006 - Casino Royale
2007 - No Country For Old Men
2008 - The Dark Knight (I've not actually seen it yet, but it looks AWESOME)
Monday, February 18, 2008
Countdown
Another weekend has passed, and I'm now into my last few days of home-based working.
Both big toes are healing well, thanks to (or despite) my own cack-handed attempts at applying my own dressings.
Having been out of the office for the best part of a fortnight, I may find it difficult returning to a real 9-5 routine.
Take yesterday for example: instead of heading to bed early, I decided to watch In The Name Of The Father for the first time, because you can never get enough of Daniel Day-Lewis shouting in a Belfast accent.
Which means that I finally hit the sack at around 1am. And I got up around 9am - well I didn't get up, I just switched on the laptop and worked from the comfort of my pit.
So how will I cope with having to rise at 6.15am, and not being able to work in bed? How will I operate without my mid-afternoon Neighbours break?
I want to retire.
Both big toes are healing well, thanks to (or despite) my own cack-handed attempts at applying my own dressings.
Having been out of the office for the best part of a fortnight, I may find it difficult returning to a real 9-5 routine.
Take yesterday for example: instead of heading to bed early, I decided to watch In The Name Of The Father for the first time, because you can never get enough of Daniel Day-Lewis shouting in a Belfast accent.
Which means that I finally hit the sack at around 1am. And I got up around 9am - well I didn't get up, I just switched on the laptop and worked from the comfort of my pit.
So how will I cope with having to rise at 6.15am, and not being able to work in bed? How will I operate without my mid-afternoon Neighbours break?
I want to retire.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Last Man Standing
Mrs Wife and I went to see I Am Legend on Saturday evening.
Aside from being 28 Days Later remade on a Hollywood budget with a topless Will Smith doing chin-ups, the movie was very good.
And, as such things are wont to do, the movie got me thinking about how it would feel to be the last surviving person on Earth.
I've had that daydream on numerous occasions and from quite a young age. These fantasies have never included a mutated species of hairless, photosensitive humans. In fact, I've never really wondered why, in these fantasies, I'm left to wander the Earth alone.
Anyway, I Am Legend rekindled these thoughts. If I woke up tomorrow and found everyone else gone, what would I do?
In the short-term, food isn't going to be a problem. Start by eating everything that is going to go off fairly soon. So I'd be gorging myself on bread, milk, yoghurt, cheese and meat. Except actually cooking meat might be a problem - if everyone else is gone, there's not going to be any power - I don't know how to operate Dounreay, especially on my own.
OK, so back to the start - I need to get some generators. Not a problem, I can have whatever I want from any shop I like. But how do I hook up a generator to my house? Damn, should have paid better attention in physics. No worries, I'm sure I'll muddle through.
Right, so that's power sorted. I can transport anything I like easily - I can use any vehicle I want. So, once the initial shock of being alone on Earth has been overcome, I'm going to be playing with diggers, test driving Porsches along the empty motorways and seeing how much damage I can do with a road roller.
What else do I need to stockpile? Well, presuming that I get that pesky generator working, I'm going to need entertainment. So it's time to empty the shelves of HMV. I'm sure that every movie, ever released, EVER is going to keep me going for the remaining 50 years of my lonely existance.
That is, of course, presuming that I live that long. If I've got all the food in the world to myself, no-one to contract diseases from and no danger of being hit by a bus, can I live a normal lifespan? Perhaps I'd better not attempt to eat the world's remaining supply of chocolate single-handedly - I don't think I could defibrillate my own heart. Especially if I have to hook it up to a generator first.
I won't need to find fresh water, because I have a world full of bottled water at my disposal, not to mention all the bottles and cans of juice. So I'm OK for fluids. May as well experiment with alcohol a bit, seeing as how it's all free. Just be careful not to need my stomach pumped or break a leg doing a drunken walk along a wall. I don't think I could pump my own stomach. And starting that generator when I've got a broken leg could prove troublesome.
So, after a year or so living the high life burning around Britain in my Porsches and watching DVDs, I guess a bit of foreign travel's in order. Can I teach myself to fly a plane? Probably not. Best stick to land and sea. But there's no point sailing to France when I can drive through the Channel Tunnel. In fact, I reckon I can travel practically everywhere with a minimum of sea travel. I can get across Europe no problems, then there's that troublesome Bering Straight stopping me getting into America. Maybe I'll manage to sail across that though.
What else can I do? Have a solo kick-about in the Nou Camp? Rummage through the Queen's underwear drawer (why in hell's name did THAT appear in my head as a suggestion?!)? Decorate the home of my choice with the art of my choice?
I reckon that after 20 years or so of roaming the Earth, I'd have to settle down somewhere. That somewhere may as well be somewhere hot, so I'll go with somewhere Mediterranean, tending to the vineyards and rearing goats. My Mediterranean villa, with the Mona Lisa hung above my bed and a display of Salvador Dali's work in the sitting room, would look out onto my fleet of sports cars, 4x4s and diggers and my battalion of boats bobbing in the harbour.
The next door house can be my store - all the medicines, food, drink, fuel, DVDs, CDs and other odds and ends I'll need for my stretch as Supreme Ruler of the Whole Wide World.
It's going to be a shock if I wake up tomorrow and find this has all come true.
Aside from being 28 Days Later remade on a Hollywood budget with a topless Will Smith doing chin-ups, the movie was very good.
And, as such things are wont to do, the movie got me thinking about how it would feel to be the last surviving person on Earth.
I've had that daydream on numerous occasions and from quite a young age. These fantasies have never included a mutated species of hairless, photosensitive humans. In fact, I've never really wondered why, in these fantasies, I'm left to wander the Earth alone.
Anyway, I Am Legend rekindled these thoughts. If I woke up tomorrow and found everyone else gone, what would I do?
In the short-term, food isn't going to be a problem. Start by eating everything that is going to go off fairly soon. So I'd be gorging myself on bread, milk, yoghurt, cheese and meat. Except actually cooking meat might be a problem - if everyone else is gone, there's not going to be any power - I don't know how to operate Dounreay, especially on my own.
OK, so back to the start - I need to get some generators. Not a problem, I can have whatever I want from any shop I like. But how do I hook up a generator to my house? Damn, should have paid better attention in physics. No worries, I'm sure I'll muddle through.
Right, so that's power sorted. I can transport anything I like easily - I can use any vehicle I want. So, once the initial shock of being alone on Earth has been overcome, I'm going to be playing with diggers, test driving Porsches along the empty motorways and seeing how much damage I can do with a road roller.
What else do I need to stockpile? Well, presuming that I get that pesky generator working, I'm going to need entertainment. So it's time to empty the shelves of HMV. I'm sure that every movie, ever released, EVER is going to keep me going for the remaining 50 years of my lonely existance.
That is, of course, presuming that I live that long. If I've got all the food in the world to myself, no-one to contract diseases from and no danger of being hit by a bus, can I live a normal lifespan? Perhaps I'd better not attempt to eat the world's remaining supply of chocolate single-handedly - I don't think I could defibrillate my own heart. Especially if I have to hook it up to a generator first.
I won't need to find fresh water, because I have a world full of bottled water at my disposal, not to mention all the bottles and cans of juice. So I'm OK for fluids. May as well experiment with alcohol a bit, seeing as how it's all free. Just be careful not to need my stomach pumped or break a leg doing a drunken walk along a wall. I don't think I could pump my own stomach. And starting that generator when I've got a broken leg could prove troublesome.
So, after a year or so living the high life burning around Britain in my Porsches and watching DVDs, I guess a bit of foreign travel's in order. Can I teach myself to fly a plane? Probably not. Best stick to land and sea. But there's no point sailing to France when I can drive through the Channel Tunnel. In fact, I reckon I can travel practically everywhere with a minimum of sea travel. I can get across Europe no problems, then there's that troublesome Bering Straight stopping me getting into America. Maybe I'll manage to sail across that though.
What else can I do? Have a solo kick-about in the Nou Camp? Rummage through the Queen's underwear drawer (why in hell's name did THAT appear in my head as a suggestion?!)? Decorate the home of my choice with the art of my choice?
I reckon that after 20 years or so of roaming the Earth, I'd have to settle down somewhere. That somewhere may as well be somewhere hot, so I'll go with somewhere Mediterranean, tending to the vineyards and rearing goats. My Mediterranean villa, with the Mona Lisa hung above my bed and a display of Salvador Dali's work in the sitting room, would look out onto my fleet of sports cars, 4x4s and diggers and my battalion of boats bobbing in the harbour.
The next door house can be my store - all the medicines, food, drink, fuel, DVDs, CDs and other odds and ends I'll need for my stretch as Supreme Ruler of the Whole Wide World.
It's going to be a shock if I wake up tomorrow and find this has all come true.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
The 2007 Jock Awards
Welcome back once again to the second annual Jock Awards (like the Oscars, but without Billy Crystal presenting).
Without any further ado (or any ado at all), let's get down to the awards.
The Stone Roses award for Album of The Year: (Nominees: The Enemy - We'll Live and Die In These Towns; The Pigeon Detectives - Wait For Me; Arctic Monkeys - Favourite Worst Nightmare; Kings of Leon - Because Of The Times; The Cooper Temple Clause - Make This Your Own)
Scooping the prestigious (in no-one's eyes) Album of The Year award for the second consecutive time, the Arctic Monkeys proved they are no flash in the pan. Moving on from their classic debut, Favourite Worst Nightmare was louder, harder and grittier - Matt Helders' drumming alone is ferocious. Another faultless record from the Sheffield lads - now it's "difficult third record" time.
The Strawberry Fields Forever award for Single of The Year: (Nominees: Arctic Monkeys - Fluorescent Adolescent; The White Stripes - Icky Thump; Soulja Boy - Crank Dat (Soulja Boy); The Enemy - We'll Live and Die In These Towns; The Pigeon Detectives - I'm Not Sorry; Kings Of Leon - On Call)
A tough category to call, given that singles aren't really singles any more - they're just a means to promote an album. But for making me sit up and take notice, it would probably have to be The White Stripes' Icky Thump - one of Jack White's most finger-blistering guitar riffs shoe-horned into an odd-sounding track containing Meg White's standard mono-beat and what sound like untuned bagpipes. Sadly, the album from which the track is taken failed to live up to expectations.
The Rolling Stones award for Live Act of The Year: (Nominees: The Cooper Temple Clause; Kings of Leon; Miyagi; Go! Team; Primal Scream)
This category is also a tough one in which to select a winner, given the high standard of live performances which I've seen this year. Kings of Leon were magnificent at the start of December, whilst Go! Team and Primal Scream were both superb at this year's inaugural Connect festival. But the award must go to The Cooper Temple Clause, whose final tour I witnessed at Aberdeen's Lemon Tree, a venue which may now follow the band into the history books. It would be unthinkable to lose both in a single year. As always, the Clause gave a throat-shredding, instrument-swapping tour de force at The Lemon Tree, even without the sadly departed Didz Hammond, now a Dirty Pretty Thing.
The Goodfellas Award for Movie of the Year: (Nominees: Pirates of The Caribbean III; Transformers; The Simpsons Movie; American Gangster)
Twenty years on, and the Transformers have lost none of their magic. To see Optimus Prime, Starscream and Bumblebee in a real-life action movie was awesome. Roll on the sequels.
The Knight Rider award for TV Programme of The Year: (Nominees: Lost; Dragons' Den; Heroes)
At the end of the second series, I was starting to think that I was losing interest. But by the end of the third series of Lost, I was completely hooked all over again. They're going to get off the island - we know that much. But what happens? A special mention must also be made for Heroes, which would have been a clear winner if not pitted against Lost. Many a workplace debate has been had over the relative merits of Hiro Nakamura and Peter Petrelli.
The Marilyn Monroe award for Babe of The Year: (Nominees: Keira Knightley; Amanda Bynes; Hayden Panettiere)
Assuming that Mrs Wife has won this award from now until the end of time, we'll instead look for a runner-up. Keira's too skinny, so instead the winner is Amanda Bynes, whom I'd never heard of until I saw her in Hairspray. Yes, she plays a schoolgirl in the film (as does fellow nominee Hayden Panettiere in Heroes), but she's 21 in real life. And she's hot.
The Jet Set Willy Award for Computer Game of The Year: (Nominees: Football Manager 2008; Final Fantasy X2; Guitar Hero)
It may not be as addictive as previous versions, but Football Manager 2008 is still the single biggest drain on my free time, sleep and marriage. I WILL win the Champions League with Rangers....
The Godfather III award for Biggest Disappointment of The Year: (Nominees: The White Stripes - Icky Thump; Ian Brown live; The Cooper Temple Clause splitting; the closure of The Lemon Tree)
The White Stripes album may have been a turkey (I've decided - Jack White is a phenomenal guitar player, but a patchy songwriter at best), Ian Brown may have been in a differet time zone to the tune at his Dundee gig, and The Lemon Tree closing is a kick in nuts to all music fans in the northeast, but the biggest disappointment from my point of view was the demise of The Cooper Temple Clause. No more of their howling, roaring, electro-rock - a huge loss to the live music scene.
The Screamadelica award for Scottish Album of The Year: (Nominee: Miyagi - Lucky Face)It's been a pretty quiet year for albums of note north of the border, but the best of the lot is Miyagi's Lucky Face, released just last week at a gig in Edinburgh. They're also the only band ever to have had Groanin' Jock make a special guest appearance on guiro. Buy the record now.
Without any further ado (or any ado at all), let's get down to the awards.
The Stone Roses award for Album of The Year: (Nominees: The Enemy - We'll Live and Die In These Towns; The Pigeon Detectives - Wait For Me; Arctic Monkeys - Favourite Worst Nightmare; Kings of Leon - Because Of The Times; The Cooper Temple Clause - Make This Your Own)
Scooping the prestigious (in no-one's eyes) Album of The Year award for the second consecutive time, the Arctic Monkeys proved they are no flash in the pan. Moving on from their classic debut, Favourite Worst Nightmare was louder, harder and grittier - Matt Helders' drumming alone is ferocious. Another faultless record from the Sheffield lads - now it's "difficult third record" time.
The Strawberry Fields Forever award for Single of The Year: (Nominees: Arctic Monkeys - Fluorescent Adolescent; The White Stripes - Icky Thump; Soulja Boy - Crank Dat (Soulja Boy); The Enemy - We'll Live and Die In These Towns; The Pigeon Detectives - I'm Not Sorry; Kings Of Leon - On Call)
A tough category to call, given that singles aren't really singles any more - they're just a means to promote an album. But for making me sit up and take notice, it would probably have to be The White Stripes' Icky Thump - one of Jack White's most finger-blistering guitar riffs shoe-horned into an odd-sounding track containing Meg White's standard mono-beat and what sound like untuned bagpipes. Sadly, the album from which the track is taken failed to live up to expectations.
The Rolling Stones award for Live Act of The Year: (Nominees: The Cooper Temple Clause; Kings of Leon; Miyagi; Go! Team; Primal Scream)
This category is also a tough one in which to select a winner, given the high standard of live performances which I've seen this year. Kings of Leon were magnificent at the start of December, whilst Go! Team and Primal Scream were both superb at this year's inaugural Connect festival. But the award must go to The Cooper Temple Clause, whose final tour I witnessed at Aberdeen's Lemon Tree, a venue which may now follow the band into the history books. It would be unthinkable to lose both in a single year. As always, the Clause gave a throat-shredding, instrument-swapping tour de force at The Lemon Tree, even without the sadly departed Didz Hammond, now a Dirty Pretty Thing.
The Goodfellas Award for Movie of the Year: (Nominees: Pirates of The Caribbean III; Transformers; The Simpsons Movie; American Gangster)
Twenty years on, and the Transformers have lost none of their magic. To see Optimus Prime, Starscream and Bumblebee in a real-life action movie was awesome. Roll on the sequels.
The Knight Rider award for TV Programme of The Year: (Nominees: Lost; Dragons' Den; Heroes)
At the end of the second series, I was starting to think that I was losing interest. But by the end of the third series of Lost, I was completely hooked all over again. They're going to get off the island - we know that much. But what happens? A special mention must also be made for Heroes, which would have been a clear winner if not pitted against Lost. Many a workplace debate has been had over the relative merits of Hiro Nakamura and Peter Petrelli.
The Marilyn Monroe award for Babe of The Year: (Nominees: Keira Knightley; Amanda Bynes; Hayden Panettiere)
Assuming that Mrs Wife has won this award from now until the end of time, we'll instead look for a runner-up. Keira's too skinny, so instead the winner is Amanda Bynes, whom I'd never heard of until I saw her in Hairspray. Yes, she plays a schoolgirl in the film (as does fellow nominee Hayden Panettiere in Heroes), but she's 21 in real life. And she's hot.
The Jet Set Willy Award for Computer Game of The Year: (Nominees: Football Manager 2008; Final Fantasy X2; Guitar Hero)
It may not be as addictive as previous versions, but Football Manager 2008 is still the single biggest drain on my free time, sleep and marriage. I WILL win the Champions League with Rangers....
The Godfather III award for Biggest Disappointment of The Year: (Nominees: The White Stripes - Icky Thump; Ian Brown live; The Cooper Temple Clause splitting; the closure of The Lemon Tree)
The White Stripes album may have been a turkey (I've decided - Jack White is a phenomenal guitar player, but a patchy songwriter at best), Ian Brown may have been in a differet time zone to the tune at his Dundee gig, and The Lemon Tree closing is a kick in nuts to all music fans in the northeast, but the biggest disappointment from my point of view was the demise of The Cooper Temple Clause. No more of their howling, roaring, electro-rock - a huge loss to the live music scene.
The Screamadelica award for Scottish Album of The Year: (Nominee: Miyagi - Lucky Face)It's been a pretty quiet year for albums of note north of the border, but the best of the lot is Miyagi's Lucky Face, released just last week at a gig in Edinburgh. They're also the only band ever to have had Groanin' Jock make a special guest appearance on guiro. Buy the record now.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Cold Days and Classic Movies
There's a nasty nip in the air today (no Pearl Harbour jokes please) here on the east coast of Scotland, and it's clear that winter is most definitely either here or on the way.
When Mrs Wife and I made the decision almost a year ago to move east, we did so knowing full well that the weather would be drier, but most certainly colder. But I'd forgotten just how bitterly cold it can be over on this side of the country.
The heating in my office didn't seem to be working too effectively this morning, and hopefully this won't be an indication of things to come, as the days will certainly get colder as we reach mid winter.
And this evening, I am left to my own devices, rabbit-sitting duties aside, as Mrs Wife is in Edinburgh for training. Last night, faced with the prospect of a free evening, I decided to watch the The Shawshank Redemption for the first time.
I don't know how I'd managed not to see the movie before, but I'd heard a lot about it - with several friends placing it amongst the greatest movies ever.
And my verdict - yeah, it's good, but I don't think it's quite deserving of the legendary status bestowed on it by some people.
Certainly not a patch on Star Wars.....
When Mrs Wife and I made the decision almost a year ago to move east, we did so knowing full well that the weather would be drier, but most certainly colder. But I'd forgotten just how bitterly cold it can be over on this side of the country.
The heating in my office didn't seem to be working too effectively this morning, and hopefully this won't be an indication of things to come, as the days will certainly get colder as we reach mid winter.
And this evening, I am left to my own devices, rabbit-sitting duties aside, as Mrs Wife is in Edinburgh for training. Last night, faced with the prospect of a free evening, I decided to watch the The Shawshank Redemption for the first time.
I don't know how I'd managed not to see the movie before, but I'd heard a lot about it - with several friends placing it amongst the greatest movies ever.
And my verdict - yeah, it's good, but I don't think it's quite deserving of the legendary status bestowed on it by some people.
Certainly not a patch on Star Wars.....
Monday, November 05, 2007
Simpsonized
The Simpsons Movie has been out for months.
Pointless? Entirely. Fun? Definitely. I encourage everyone to Simpsonize themselves and give Burger King some free advertising on the Blogosphere while they're at it.
I'm well aware of this.
But it's taken me a while to get round to Simpsonizing myself at this website.
Here's the picture of me:
And this is me visiting the Itchy and Scratchy studios:
Pointless? Entirely. Fun? Definitely. I encourage everyone to Simpsonize themselves and give Burger King some free advertising on the Blogosphere while they're at it.
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Hollywood Schmollywood
A while back, I added a post that linked to Ten Things Hollywood Thinks Computers Can Do.
And that got me thinking: what other barely believable crap do we put up with in our movies?
So I started drawing up a little list, which I like to think (in my own muddle-headed, delirious and dream-like fashion) will build up into a substantial compendium of nonsense peddled by directors over in LALA Land.
Here are a few for starters:
1) It is possible to have a high speed car chase during daylight hours in any city on Earth.
I've never driven in London, LA or New York, but I have driven in Melbourne, Perth, Adelaide, Edinburgh and Glasgow (not to mention on roads in Thailand - but that's a scarier post for another day). It is not possible, in the centre of any of those cities, to drive at anything above 20mph. In most of them, most of the time you're barely moving at all. So how is it therefore possible to drive at speeds in excess of 60mph in any of the world's major Metropolises? (Should that be Metropolii?) If you drove that fast in any city on Earth during the day, you and countless other people would be dead very quickly. And your car would be extremely dead as well.
2) It is possible to knock someone out with one punch. OK, this may actually be possible. But, having worked in some pretty boisterous pubs on two continents and as a security guard at football matches, I've still never seen it happen. And, from what I've seen of movies, it mostly happens to minor villains, the type of muscled goons that Big Bosses use to man doors and guard prisoners. Now, it strikes me that if your sole job requirement is to be hard and menacing, ending up out cold after one punch would be a major hinderance to your long-term career plans.
3) Simultaneous orgasms happen every time a couple has sex. Let's just leave that one be....
4) 28-year-old women who look like Denise Richards are Nuclear Physicists. I'm not saying breasted humans can't be nuclear physicists. Or that scientists can't be good looking. Just that I would imagine that if you're a nuclear physicist experienced enough to be dismantling warheads in Kazakhstan, you're probably not 28.Or female. Or good-looking. Or called Christmas Jones. You're a 45-year-old man with a beard. Called Neil. (The 45-year-old man that is, not his beard.)
5) Sarah Jessica Parker is attractive. Need I say more?
Feel free to add to this list of Hollywood absurdities - there are plenty more to choose from....
And that got me thinking: what other barely believable crap do we put up with in our movies?
So I started drawing up a little list, which I like to think (in my own muddle-headed, delirious and dream-like fashion) will build up into a substantial compendium of nonsense peddled by directors over in LALA Land.
Here are a few for starters:
1) It is possible to have a high speed car chase during daylight hours in any city on Earth.
I've never driven in London, LA or New York, but I have driven in Melbourne, Perth, Adelaide, Edinburgh and Glasgow (not to mention on roads in Thailand - but that's a scarier post for another day). It is not possible, in the centre of any of those cities, to drive at anything above 20mph. In most of them, most of the time you're barely moving at all. So how is it therefore possible to drive at speeds in excess of 60mph in any of the world's major Metropolises? (Should that be Metropolii?) If you drove that fast in any city on Earth during the day, you and countless other people would be dead very quickly. And your car would be extremely dead as well.
2) It is possible to knock someone out with one punch. OK, this may actually be possible. But, having worked in some pretty boisterous pubs on two continents and as a security guard at football matches, I've still never seen it happen. And, from what I've seen of movies, it mostly happens to minor villains, the type of muscled goons that Big Bosses use to man doors and guard prisoners. Now, it strikes me that if your sole job requirement is to be hard and menacing, ending up out cold after one punch would be a major hinderance to your long-term career plans.
3) Simultaneous orgasms happen every time a couple has sex. Let's just leave that one be....
4) 28-year-old women who look like Denise Richards are Nuclear Physicists. I'm not saying breasted humans can't be nuclear physicists. Or that scientists can't be good looking. Just that I would imagine that if you're a nuclear physicist experienced enough to be dismantling warheads in Kazakhstan, you're probably not 28.Or female. Or good-looking. Or called Christmas Jones. You're a 45-year-old man with a beard. Called Neil. (The 45-year-old man that is, not his beard.)
5) Sarah Jessica Parker is attractive. Need I say more?
Feel free to add to this list of Hollywood absurdities - there are plenty more to choose from....
Monday, September 24, 2007
Bill Gates Could Be A Terrorist
Seeing as how no-one fancied stepping into my shoes and contributing to this webs(h)ite over the next few days, I'll leave you with this little funny courtesy of Cracked.com.
Five Things Hollywood Thinks Computers Can Do - my personal favourite is Independence Day's Mac-compatible alien civilisation....
Five Things Hollywood Thinks Computers Can Do - my personal favourite is Independence Day's Mac-compatible alien civilisation....
Monday, September 17, 2007
Soundtrack of My Life
Each month, Mojo magazine interviews three celebrities or musicians for its All Back To My Place page, asking the same questions each month. I figured I'd prepare my answers just in case they ask me for the next issue.
What music are you currently grooving to?
I don't know if it can be classed as "grooving", but I'm listening to The Enemy's debut album We'll Live and Die In These Towns a lot. It reminds me of The Jam, in a kind of vitriolic, call-to-arms, sound of the suburbs sort of way. Nowadays, I listen to music most when I'm driving to and from work, but I have a car share, so I tend not to subject her to anything too outrageous or loud. I'm also waiting for my copy of Hard Fi's Once Upon A Time In The West to be delivered.
What, if push comes to shove, is your all-time favourite album?
The Stone Roses' debut album has been my favourite album since I was about 18. I can't really put into words what it is that makes it so important: the whole package transcends the individual songs and the individual players. But the opening rumble of I Wanna Be Adored, the psychedelic punk of Made of Stone and the epic closer I Am The Resurrection are enough in themselves to make it the greatest record of all time.
What was the first record you ever bought? And where did you buy it?
It was the soundtrack to the movie Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on cassette from John Menzies in Dundee (now replaced by a Tesco Metro) in 1990 or 1991. I'm always surprised when rock stars are interviewed and asked what their first record was, and they say The Jam, or The Beatles, or The Sex Pistols. I went through a long phase of liking shite pop music, a phase I call "being a kid". Kids don't buy Sex Pistols records - they buy novelty records, movie soundtracks and pop. Anyway, the soundtrack to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles included the awesome T-U-R-T-L-E Power by Partners In Kryme, This Is What We Do by MC Hammer and 9.95 by Spunkadelic, all of which I have recently downloaded from the internet. I think I might still have the original tape hidden away in either Mither's or Faither's loft.
Which musician have you ever wanted to be?
Anyone who can play an instrument. I envy people who can pick up an acoustic guitar and rattle off five or six songs faultlessly to entertain a roomful of people. I'd love to be able to play drums like Dave Grohl, bass like Flea or guitar like John Squire.
What do you sing in the shower?
I always used to sing in the shower, but nowadays I get up at 6.15am, which means that I tend not to, for two reasons:
a) 6.15am is not a "singing in the shower" time of day
b) The bathroom at Dungroanin' is en suite, and Mrs Wife would probably not care too much for being woken up at 6.15am by me running through a medley of Super Furry Animals songs.
On the occasions when I do sing, I find that Elvis songs sound great in the shower, as the cubicle makes my voice, which is quite deep (especially when I'm tired), echo. So I'm quite partial to belting out Devil In Disguise and Suspicious Minds. I also like singing Reef's Naked, for someone reason that I haven't been able to fathom, but which may well be Freudian.
What is your favourite Saturday night record?
If it's one record that I'll put on before going out, it's The Stone Roses' debut album, cranked right up so that the bass rattles the windows. I have to listen to the whole thing, finishing with the instrumental at the end of I Am The Resurrection. However, in this age of CD burners and MP3 players, it's all too easy to make up a playlist especially for Saturday nights. When I was at university, my flatmate and I made a going out CD that included Primal Scream's Kill All Hippies, Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit, The White Room by Cream and White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane, amongst others. No-one else liked it, but we thought it was ace.
And your Sunday morning record?
I tend not to listen to music on Sunday mornings, but when I do, it can be almost anything. A bit of Motown can start the day nicely, as can The Beatles. Probably not Metallica, Motorhead or Probot though.
I know many of you can't stand memes, but if you want to play along, feel free. I'd be especially interested to hear how The Tomahawk Kid and Erica would answer.
What music are you currently grooving to?
I don't know if it can be classed as "grooving", but I'm listening to The Enemy's debut album We'll Live and Die In These Towns a lot. It reminds me of The Jam, in a kind of vitriolic, call-to-arms, sound of the suburbs sort of way. Nowadays, I listen to music most when I'm driving to and from work, but I have a car share, so I tend not to subject her to anything too outrageous or loud. I'm also waiting for my copy of Hard Fi's Once Upon A Time In The West to be delivered.
What, if push comes to shove, is your all-time favourite album?
The Stone Roses' debut album has been my favourite album since I was about 18. I can't really put into words what it is that makes it so important: the whole package transcends the individual songs and the individual players. But the opening rumble of I Wanna Be Adored, the psychedelic punk of Made of Stone and the epic closer I Am The Resurrection are enough in themselves to make it the greatest record of all time.
What was the first record you ever bought? And where did you buy it?
It was the soundtrack to the movie Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on cassette from John Menzies in Dundee (now replaced by a Tesco Metro) in 1990 or 1991. I'm always surprised when rock stars are interviewed and asked what their first record was, and they say The Jam, or The Beatles, or The Sex Pistols. I went through a long phase of liking shite pop music, a phase I call "being a kid". Kids don't buy Sex Pistols records - they buy novelty records, movie soundtracks and pop. Anyway, the soundtrack to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles included the awesome T-U-R-T-L-E Power by Partners In Kryme, This Is What We Do by MC Hammer and 9.95 by Spunkadelic, all of which I have recently downloaded from the internet. I think I might still have the original tape hidden away in either Mither's or Faither's loft.
Which musician have you ever wanted to be?
Anyone who can play an instrument. I envy people who can pick up an acoustic guitar and rattle off five or six songs faultlessly to entertain a roomful of people. I'd love to be able to play drums like Dave Grohl, bass like Flea or guitar like John Squire.
What do you sing in the shower?
I always used to sing in the shower, but nowadays I get up at 6.15am, which means that I tend not to, for two reasons:
a) 6.15am is not a "singing in the shower" time of day
b) The bathroom at Dungroanin' is en suite, and Mrs Wife would probably not care too much for being woken up at 6.15am by me running through a medley of Super Furry Animals songs.
On the occasions when I do sing, I find that Elvis songs sound great in the shower, as the cubicle makes my voice, which is quite deep (especially when I'm tired), echo. So I'm quite partial to belting out Devil In Disguise and Suspicious Minds. I also like singing Reef's Naked, for someone reason that I haven't been able to fathom, but which may well be Freudian.
What is your favourite Saturday night record?
If it's one record that I'll put on before going out, it's The Stone Roses' debut album, cranked right up so that the bass rattles the windows. I have to listen to the whole thing, finishing with the instrumental at the end of I Am The Resurrection. However, in this age of CD burners and MP3 players, it's all too easy to make up a playlist especially for Saturday nights. When I was at university, my flatmate and I made a going out CD that included Primal Scream's Kill All Hippies, Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit, The White Room by Cream and White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane, amongst others. No-one else liked it, but we thought it was ace.
And your Sunday morning record?
I tend not to listen to music on Sunday mornings, but when I do, it can be almost anything. A bit of Motown can start the day nicely, as can The Beatles. Probably not Metallica, Motorhead or Probot though.
I know many of you can't stand memes, but if you want to play along, feel free. I'd be especially interested to hear how The Tomahawk Kid and Erica would answer.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Sumptuous Cinema
This weekend, Mrs Wife and I, having nothing better to do, went to the cinema twice.
In back-to-back showings, we saw Transformers and The Simpsons Movie, finishing a fairly lengthy run of kids' movies that we've seen lately. So, how did the summer's big blockbusters fare?
Transformers was, quite simply, awesome. I may be exaggerating ever so slightly, but not much. You see, for someone who was a five-year-old boy in 1985, it doesn't get much more exciting than seeing Optimus Prime and Bumblebee appear on the big screen and transform before your very eyes. The effects were incredible, and the violence was pretty good for a kids' film. My only disappointment was that Hot Rod wasn't in the movie - but maybe he'll make it into the sequels.
The Simpsons Movie was a bit of a disappointment. Which shouldn't really come as much of a surprise, as the show itself has been treading water for a long time. The general impression I got was that if you'd seen the trailers, you'd already seen most of the funniest jokes. It wasn't a complete turkey, because The Simpsons is still funnier than most other programmes kicking around at the moment. But when the asides and throw-away jokes are funnier than the main plot of the movie, something isn't right.
So this evening, when I have three hours to kill between work and a football match, I'm going to the cinema again. Unless Die Hard 4.0 or Goldfinger is on, I'll be going to see either Transformers or The Simpsons Movie again. Optimus Prime or Homer Simpson? More than 20 years later, there is no competition.
In back-to-back showings, we saw Transformers and The Simpsons Movie, finishing a fairly lengthy run of kids' movies that we've seen lately. So, how did the summer's big blockbusters fare?
Transformers was, quite simply, awesome. I may be exaggerating ever so slightly, but not much. You see, for someone who was a five-year-old boy in 1985, it doesn't get much more exciting than seeing Optimus Prime and Bumblebee appear on the big screen and transform before your very eyes. The effects were incredible, and the violence was pretty good for a kids' film. My only disappointment was that Hot Rod wasn't in the movie - but maybe he'll make it into the sequels.
The Simpsons Movie was a bit of a disappointment. Which shouldn't really come as much of a surprise, as the show itself has been treading water for a long time. The general impression I got was that if you'd seen the trailers, you'd already seen most of the funniest jokes. It wasn't a complete turkey, because The Simpsons is still funnier than most other programmes kicking around at the moment. But when the asides and throw-away jokes are funnier than the main plot of the movie, something isn't right.
So this evening, when I have three hours to kill between work and a football match, I'm going to the cinema again. Unless Die Hard 4.0 or Goldfinger is on, I'll be going to see either Transformers or The Simpsons Movie again. Optimus Prime or Homer Simpson? More than 20 years later, there is no competition.
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