Elephant polo

I've never been to an elephant polo match, but I think it would be quite entertaining. I've ridden elephants in Thailand, and was surprised by how graceful and quiet they are, even when walking uphill through a jungle whilst carrying four passengers.

Anyway, Advocates for Animals is calling for Chivas Brothers to end its sponsorship of elephant polo.

I've met the Duke of Argyll on a few occasions, and my paper has run stories on his Elephant World Cup exploits. From the way he describes it, no harm comes to the elephants, they aren't mistreated, and all money raised goes to charities that care for elephants.

But blinkered do-gooders can't see the benefits, and simply decide that elephant polo must be wrong and that it should end.

In the words of Billy Connolly: "Every time I meet a vegan, I have an overwhelming urge to bite a live pig's arse".